How to Motivate a Teenager Who Doesn’t Care

How to motivate a teenager who doesn't care

Teenagers usually do not care about anything, which is normal. A teenager who is starting to have independence may be overwhelmed with obligations and responsibilities, and they may be highly motivated to avoid those obligations and responsibilities. How do you motivate a teenager who doesn’t care?

Teenagers are so anxious about obligations; they think of it as a trap that is completely out of their control and strives to resist it.

Teenagers are not innately unmotivated. Perhaps they are just motivated to resist your request and would rather sit and do nothing.

What can Parents do to Help with Low Motivation?

Find out what motivates them and what matters to them. To get them to put aside the “I don’t care” attitude, you need to find something that they are so passionate about. This will help you motivate a teenager who doesn’t care.

·         Have Confidence in Your Teen

Be a guide, encourage them, and be available to them if they need help, rather than doing everything for them.

Point out or praise one of their skills. It’s imperative that you believe your teenager is capable of doing something because if you don’t, they won’t either. Your teens will sense your confidence in them.

·         Responsible Means More Freedom

Consequently, the more responsible they act, the more you will trust them to do a lot more things.

Therefore, the more they are willing to do their chores, take care of themselves and show maturity, the more privileges they will receive.

If they are showing more initiative, encourage them by rewarding their efforts.  If you reward their efforts, they’ll feel motivated and will get and stay motivated to do things that they don’t desire to do.

This will help them later in life when they have to put in hard work and effort to fulfill one particular desire.

 It won’t take long for your teen to learn that with responsibility comes a bit of lifting up the boundaries for them.

·         Sleep schedule

Make sure your teen has a healthy sleep schedule. If necessary, create a sleep schedule for him or her. This will ensure that they get enough sleep and go to bed on time.

Perhaps your teen stays up late browsing the web. If your teen sleeps during the day and wakes up at night, help him or her get back to sleep at night.

How to Deal with a Lazy Unmotivated Teenager

·         Resistance is Natural

As a parent, you need to remember that your teens are now at an age when they want to be able to make their own decisions. Therefore, telling them to do something they don’t want to will lead to some resistance. Please realize that this is a vital part of your teens’ growth and independence.

Respecting their need for independence will make motivating them easier.

While all of that is true, we still want and expect our teenagers to contribute to the household. We want them to do their chores, not be glued to their screens all day long, get enough sleep, and be responsible and thoughtful.

·         Set Small, Attainable Goals for Them

It can be difficult to motivate them to do their chores, come out of the room for dinner, or finish their homework. Although it is frustrating for parents, the problem is your teenager doesn’t see these things as necessary because their brain does not deem them important.

Goals that are too big can be overwhelming for most people. The same can be said for teenagers. Set smaller, easily achievable goals for your teen so he or she can feel that sense of achievement. It is also worthwhile to celebrate small achievements, as these are the ones that will lead to bigger ones.

How to Motivate a Teenager Who Doesn’t Care

·         Empower Through Choice

If you are trying to gain control of your teenager through fear, that usually doesn’t work

We have to empower our teenagers through choice, which means letting them weigh the consequences of each option and letting them decide what they would like to do.

RELATED: How To Use Tough Love When Parenting Troubled Teens

You must allow your teenager to choose. This means allowing them to grasp the consequences of each choice. They can weigh them and decide what they want to do, or even if they make a terrible choice, let the consequences happen. This will enable them to learn that every decision has consequences.

Guide Them into Adulthood

A parent’s duty is to guide a teen into adulthood, a stage in which they must be independent of you, make healthy decisions on their own, fail and face the consequences. 

In order for your teenager to succeed in adulthood, you do not have to bail them out of trouble to protect them from natural consequences. Instead, you need to guide them by giving them the tools to help them learn right from wrong and, most importantly, by teaching them that choices have consequences.

Point out their Strengths, Talents, and Gifts

Teenagers have a hard time seeing their unique qualities, so parents should take the time to point this out to them. It is your job as their parent to help them understand themselves better so they can see their worth and value and to help them build their self-confidence so they can achieve success in whatever they do.

When you talk to your teen about something they might be doing wrong or if they are in trouble, be sure to remind them of their good qualities. Describe their strengths, talents, and gifts as you remind them of their qualities.

Using this method, you’ll empower them to become the remarkable person you know they’re destined to be, and they’ll be motivated to take action to start living the life they dream of having for themselves.


Motivation comes from recognition. As parents, we expect our teens to behave in certain ways but don’t thank them for their efforts or for following through with what we asked them to do.

To change this, look for anything they’re doing that shows maturity and responsibility. Pay attention to what they’re doing and thank them, even if it’s something you think they should be doing already. They will be even more motivated if we thank them when they do it.

Work on Your Relationship

Your teenager is more influenced by you than it appears, but if you don’t have a genuinely close relationship with your child, if they tend not to want much to do with you, then your child might not be interested in taking your advice or listening to you.

Start building a more connected, deeper relationship with your teenager and work on improving your communication, because only when your teen feels connected to you will they be more likely to listen.

Final thought

Make sure you connect with your teenager every time you can, such as when you see your teenager meeting your expectations and following the rules, and making good decisions. This will let them know how much you appreciate what they have done to earn your trust.

In addition, let them know that you are willing to give them more freedom because of it. As a result, your teen will be able to appreciate hard work, and they will learn that hard work pays off.

Parents can use this method to help their teens gain greater independence as they mature and prove they are responsible.

I hope you will find this how-to motivate a teenager who doesn’t care article useful.

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